Perfect Your Hook!

Whether they’ve received a free review copy or paid to purchase your book, the majority of readers will only give it 5 pages to hook their interest. If they don’t care about the characters, don’t understand what’s happening, or are turned off by the presentation of material, they’ll put your book down and never pick it up again.

It is critical that your first chapter sucks them in and keeps them reading. There’s no use editing the full book if you lose readers in the first chapter.

We’ve set up a unique “first chapter critique” service which includes up to 5,000 words (which should actually include 2~3 chapters… or a prologue, preface or intro). Not only will this be an instructive developmental edit, pointing out exactly where your weaknesses lie and what you can do to make them better, it’ll also include:

  • genre expectations
  • target audience
  • character sympathy
  • scene depth
  • catalyst or inciting incident
  • writing style & fluency
  • pacing and intrigue
  • conflict and suspense
  • fatal flaw or core lack
  • feedback on weak writing
  • publishing advice


Is your book ready for editing?

Do you have a manuscript that you think is finished, but aren’t sure if it’s ready to publish? Are you worried about whether anybody else will think it’s any good? Are you putting together a book proposal or query to attract an agent or publisher, or preparing to self-publish for the first time? How about just starting a book, but want to make sure it’s marketable before you invest more time in it?

Make sure you have a strong start and a killer opening before you waste extra time and money. This in-depth structural critique will help you figure out who your audience is and how to captivate them from the get-go.

Get feedback now for 497 $297

Hit the button below to get everything on this page.

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This will take you to PayPal to checkout safely. You can use a credit or debit card. After payment, you should be redirected to a form where you can upload your manuscript; if you have any issues, just email “[email protected]” directly.

Bonus #1: get a head start on your book launch

I’ve been teaching authors how to market their books for over a decade, and sold nearly 100K books myself. My latest course is called the “21 Day Bestselling Author Platform” and is meant to help authors build an audience of fans before they even publish their book. It’s $297 on its own, but I’m giving it away for free to all our editing clients.

So on top of real critical feedback on your first 5000 words, so you know exactly how close you are to launching a successful bestseller, you’ll also get an up to date, self-study book marketing course to help you figure out your marketing plan.


Bonus #2: blurb revision

Your blurb is the short sales copy that will be on your Amazon page of back cover. I’ll help you figure out your audience, your keywords and categories, and then edit your blurb until it drastically boosts conversions. This is so important, and tricky to get right. Some people charge $500 just for “amazon optimization” or “SEO metadata analysis” – but don’t be fooled, this is mostly about making sure your blurb ticks all the right buttons, for both human and robot visitors.

Hit the button below to get everything on this page.

Get Started


Testimonials from happy clients

“I have started a book several times over the past few years but the main problem has been just how do I do this and achieve a professional outcome? I have looked at several options but none have seemed right for me and many were over complicated to grasp. Your way of explaining is absolutely brilliant and within a couple of days I have learnt more than I have in years. I have been a frustrated author for a few decades and the main problem was how to get started and you have 100% solved this for me. Anyway, mega thanks again, really appreciated.” – Annie JumeauAuthor


“I can’t thank you enough for taking the time to do a developmental edit on this. It was above and beyond and is greatly appreciated. It was exactly the guidance I needed to hear, and I would have waited three weeks for that, let alone a few days. Your insights will go a long way towards making this the best novel it can be.” – Mikael CarlsonThriller Author


“Your suggestions have been wonderful! There was a lot of input you provided that I had not even considered, and will definitely help overall! Looking forward to going through the remainder of your suggestions tomorrow! Thank you again for your time!” – JackyPersonal Memoir


“Finally, someone with the skills for analyzing a novice writer. Before meeting Derek Murphy, the “agents” I met in the publishing industry did nothing but side-step my requests for evaluation. It is now evident to me that the rubric which measures whether your book is sell-able or dead in the water, is literary experience. Your analysis combined honest evaluation with the goal being to produce a better book. I believe, this type of feed-back is essential to ANYONE who is writing.” – Dr. George A. MungerPhD


“Thank you so much for this. I got the edits and I’m really happy with the extensive notes you made. It really does help. I think I’m going to do a major re-write. Your input was so super helpful.Marc


“This is EXACTLY the kind of feedback I was hoping for. Most appreciated. I have been continuing to tweak the story, but your feedback has really given me things I can sink my teeth into!” – P. J. ViscioHorror Author


Refund policy – 100% guarantee

If for any reason you’re not satisfied with our first chapter critique service, we’ll refund you 100%, no questions asked… and you can even keep the free book marketing course to get a head start on your launch.

PS. This service is personally provided by Derek Murphy (the founder of Book Butchers, who holds a PhD in Literature. His plotting and writing tips and videos have had over 2 million views on YouTube).